One Year Ago Today

A year ago today we lost our pregnancy. I shared about the experience some days later in my post, "Things You Can Never Prepare For." In some ways, it feels like yesterday, in others I can't believe it has only been a year. A lot has happened since a year ago, most of it bad. We've lost multiple loved ones, a pandemic in the form of COVID-19 wreaks havoc on our planet (and especially America), and basically, the end of 2019 into all of 2020 was a big old bust for our family. It's been hard, in other words. That said, there are things I'm thankful for.

I love my wife and child, I love my side of the family, and appreciate the care and support they gave us during these tough times. I value Samii's relatives who are still with us and wonderful people. I am thankful for our friends. I am so pleased that Clarkson is doing well with preschool--whether it be sometimes virtual and sometimes in-person with heavy safety measures. We had an awful year, possibly the worst year ever, but it showed how loved we are too. I can only hope that 2021 is better.

I want to be optimistic for the next year. After hitting a rock bottom of sorts this year I feel things can only improve. We have a new President (Joe Biden) about to take power from the worst one ever (Trump was terrible), a vaccine for COVID-19 is on the way, my son continues to love school, there are good things happening or about to happen. I have some hope because without that there is only abject despair, and I'm tired of feeling that so much in 2020. One year ago today was so, so hard, and things just got worse from there. I truly believe that with this arrival at, "A year later," things will change for the better. It may be a bit of blind optimism, but I want to be optimistic after so much despair. 

I'm hoping a year from today I can look back and remark what a good year it was. All I can do at this point is to believe in some positivity and continue to carry my love for my child I couldn't have in my heart along with everyone else we lost this year plus all those I adore who are alive. Let's make 2021 a year of joy and light, or at least try our hardest to make it that way.